Sixty Years Of Bond… James Bond

LBoM: Retrospectives

2022 sees the James Bond film series reach the big six zero years old. It all began back in 1962 with Dr. No. Yeah, yeah, before the backlash of ‘actually’… begins. I do know that Dr. No wasn’t the first Bond film. Yes, I do know that Casino Royale from 1954 with Barry Nelson as Bond was technically the first. However, I’m talking about the start of the officially recognised franchise, the one that became a worldwide phenomenon and catapulted the James Bond character into the stratosphere.

Anyway, there are actually several other movie milestones within the Bond franchise that are worth looking at too and that’s exactly what this article is all about. Starting with that first official James Bond film from 1962, I’m going to do a quick celebratory look at all the Bond films reaching a worthy milestone in 2022.

Dr. No

Released in 1962, making this inaugural film in the long-running, sixty years old franchise. The film didn’t just launch the James Bond movie franchise, it also turned its star, Sean Connery, into a film legend. Connery had a few small roles earlier in his career but becoming James Bond would be a career-defining role. It was also a role that Sean Connery ended up detesting.

Seeing Bond sent to Jamaica when an MI6 agent is murdered. The investigation leads Bond to discover the titular Dr. No (Joseph Wiseman ) and his nefarious plan involving a shuttle launch and a radio beam weapon… whatever that is. While this is the first ‘proper’ James Bond film, the novel it is based on was the sixth. Interestingly, the film makes several references to past and future Bond adventures. So this first appearance of Bond on film was treated as the character as already existing.

The intro to Dr. No set the standard that would be followed for six decades. The famed gunbarrel shot (though Bond was not played by Sean Connery but stuntman, Bob Simmons) the iconic Bond theme, the flashy and stylised graphics-heavy title sequence. It all began right here, though there was no dedicated James Bond song that became tradition after this film. Instead, what you do get is the Bond theme that mixes into a very Jamaican rendition of the Three Blind Mice nursery rhyme.

I’ve never really been a fan of this one, to be honest. I just found it all a bit ‘dull’ for a film that was billed as being such a huge action-adventure picture. Of course, you do have to give it credit for creating such a massive and much-loved franchise. Apparently, Bond creator, Ian Fleming, said of the film after seeing it that it was:

“Dreadful. Simply dreadful.”

I don’t think I’d go that far but Dr. No is hardly one of Bond’s best. The franchise had just begun and in fact, it wasn’t even thought of as becoming a franchise at the time. Even the production studio didn’t have a lot of faith in the film. When released, reviews were very mixed with film critics really not enjoying the film for the most part. Still, it was the general public that paid for cinema tickets that made it popular and once the studio saw the money that Dr. No was bringing in, a sequel was quickly greenlit. The beginning of Bond and a sixty-year franchise was born.

You Only Live Twice

This one came out in 1967 and is fifty-five years old this year. Now in 2022, this film is becoming infamous for the whole Japanese disguise thing where Sean Connery is ‘magically’ transformed into someone of a different race. The snowflakes of today like to find offence in things decades out of date. Still, I thought transitioning into something you are not was quite a popular thing these days…

Anyway, this flick has Bond sent to Japan to investigate the disappearance of American and Soviet spacecraft, which each nation blaming the other. You Only Live Twice is the first Bond film to show Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Donald Pleasence ) proper. He had been in previous films, but never seen or only partially seen. The screenplay for the film was also written by the awesome Roald Dahl. This was also the first Bond film to really have very little to do with the novel of the same name. Dhal threw out most of the novel’s plot, only keeping a few smaller references, and instead wrote an all-new story.

At the time, this was reported as being Connery’s last time playing James Bond. It was too… for one film. Conery was enticed back Diamonds Are Forever in 1971 and the non-canonical Never Say Never Again in 1983. Just a little tit-bit for you. Do you know the last time Sean Connery officially played James Bond? It was for the From Russia with Love video game from 2005. Connery not only lent his likeness to the game but he also recorded all new dialogue as James Bond.

I actually really like this Bond outing. It may not be ‘politically correct’ these days and it’s a shame that it has been getting a lot of bad press due to the whole Japanese disguise thing. The film is much more than one outdated gadget from over half a century ago. Connery was well into the role by now and I may even go so far as to say that this was his best performance as James Bond.

The Spy Who Loved Me

1977 was the year that this Bond film hit the big screen, making it forty-five years old. By now, Sean Connery was gone and Roger Moore had stepped into the famous tuxedo. This was Moore’s third outing as James Bond. The Spy Who Loved Me was the tenth book by Ian Fleming and was also the tenth film in the franchise.

Bond has to team up with KGB agent, Major Anya Amasova (Barbara Bach), to learn of the disappearance of a British and a Soviet ballistic-missile submarine. The duo learn that the subs have been stolen by Karl Stromberg (Curt Jürgens) and he plans on creating a new civilisation under the sea called Atlantis… cos it’s a James Bond film. This is the first film where Bond gets to cross paths with fan-favourite villain, Jaws (Richard Kiel).

To be honest, I’ve never been much of a fan of Roger Moore’s take on James Bond. It was a bit on the silly side and came across as more of a parody of the character. But that is not to say that Moore’s tenure as Bond and that era of films were bad, they are kind of iconic and enjoyable in their own way. While my favourite Moore/Bond film is Live and Let Die, there’s a lot to like here with The Spy Who Loved Me. The memorable opening with the ski-chase/skydive/Union Flag parachute. ‘Wet Nellie’, that’s the awesome Lotus Esprit S1 that turns into a submarine. The Nobody Does It Better song, the first of the Bond songs that’s doesn’t share its title with the film (though Dr. No didn’t have a dedicated song). I have always felt that this film was to Roger Moore what Goldfinger was to Sean Connery.

The Living Daylights

Thirty-five is how old this one is, being released in 1987. We are now onto our fourth official James Bond with Timothy Dalton now playing the part. I have to say this right here, Timothy Dalton was the best James Bond ever. He played the part much more closely as to how Ian Fleming wrote him, he actually looked like Fleming described him too.

For this adventure, Bond is assigned to help General Georgi Koskov (Jeroen Krabbé), a KGB agent, defect. Whilst on the mission, Bond crosses paths with Kara Milovy (Maryam d’Abo), Koskov’s girlfriend who is actually trying to kill Koskov. James Bond soon learns that the whole Georgi Koskov wanting to defect was a ruse for something far more sinister.

The Living Daylights was not just a film with the best James Bond, it also brought back the iconic Aston Martin. Not seen in a Bond film since 1969’s On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, as Lotus became the Bond car manufacturer of the Roger Moore years. Aston Martin’s V8 Volante was the car here and there’s just something about James Bond and Aston Martin that works.

Both of Timothy Dalton’s outings as Bond (this and Licence to Kill) have always been vastly overlooked, I feel. It really is a shame that Dalton didn’t have the chance to come back for more. Long story short and there were behind the scenes legal issues with the James Bond rights. It took several years to sort out and by then, Timothy Dalton was perhaps a bit too old and the producers wanted a new James Bond. A third film was written for Dalton and it was set to be released in 1991. I actually have a separate article looking at that film coming up later. Anyway, after the legal issues were resolved, a new actor stepped into the role, speaking of which…

Tomorrow Never Dies

Released in 1997 and now a ripe twenty-five years old. The eighteenth James Bond film and the second to star Pierce Brosnan after GoldenEye. For me, Pierce Brosnan always felt like the Roger Moore of the nineties. Perhaps not quite as parody-like but certainly a James Bond that was a tad less serious than the predecessor.

This time around, Bond teams up with Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh), a Chinese agent. The two investigate the media mogul Elliot Carver (Jonathan Pryce) who, as it turns out, is hellbent on starting World War III via the use of his media empire… and some stolen missiles, of course. This was the first Bond film after the death of the franchise’s legendary producer, Albert R. Broccoli.

This really is not one of the best Bond outings, yet it has one of the best Bond girls with Michelle Yeoh. She’s awesome in this and I always wanted to see a Wai Lin spin-off film. She was going to return for 2002’s Die Another Day to help Bond when he was in Hong Kong. But the idea was scrapped and the character was replaced with Mr Chang (Ho Yi) instead. And on the subject of that film…

Die Another Day

Originally released for the fortieth anniversary of the James Bond franchise in 2001, now twenty years old itself. Die Another Day was specially written to pay respects to the franchise turning forty and was the last outing for Pierce Brosnan as James Bond.

After over a year of imprisonment in North Korea Bond’s freedom is exchanged for Zao (Rick Yune), the right hand-man of Korean dictator Colonel Moon (Will Yun Lee) … who Bond kind of accidentally killed. MI6 believe that Bond has been broken by the Koreans and leaked information. After escaping MI6, James Bond ends up in Cuba and meets NSA agent Giacinta ‘Jinx’ Johnson (Halle Berry). The two learn of a mysterious British businessman called Gustav Graves (Toby Stephens) and soon discover his naughty plan.

This was one of the few James Bond films I got to see at the cinema when I was a young twenty-something. Man, I was excited and I came out of the film one happy Bond fan. This film is packed with nods and references to all of the previous Bond films in the franchise. Lines of dialogue, background details, gadgets and more. Die Another Day is a feast for the eyes of a Bond fan.

I then re-watched the film a few months later on DVD… and it was utter pants. I think there’s something about watching a film at the cinema that gives the viewer a false sense of ‘wow, this is awesome’. This is not true of all films of course, but some. There’s just something about seeing a film with a crowd of people on a huge screen and an ear-bleeding sound system that can camouflage how good (or bad) a film really is.

Yes, taking in all the references was bliss for a Bond fan. But the story and characters of this film really are dull and I just didn’t notice how dull when in the cinema because I was too busy being a Bond fan and soaking up the references. I don’t outright hate this film, ‘hate’ is a very strong word and I very rarely use it. But Die Another Day is certainly a disappointment for what was supposed to be a big celebration… and it has Madonna in it too.

Skyfall

The youngest film celebrating a milestone this year. Released in 2012, Skyfall is ten-years-old. This was our latest Bond, Daniel Craig’s third outing as James Bond. And if you are any good at maths, Skyfall was released on the fiftieth anniversary of the James Bond franchise. It has that awful theme song from Adele but don’t let that put you off Skyfall is great.

Here, James Bond has retired after accidentally being shot and presumed dead. When MI6’s headquarters are blown up, Bond comes out of retirement and offers to help. Back in service and sent to Shanghai, Bond learns of a man called Raoul Silva (Javier Bardem). Silva is an ex-MI6 agent who now has a penchant for cyberterrorism and he was the man behind the attack on MI6’s HQ. Silva is captured and brought back to England… which was actually part of his grand plan.

Skyfall is great, not my favourite Daniel Craig outing, that has to go to Casino Royale. But this film is awesome. There’s just something raw about it that makes it stand out. A very different Bond film but still familiar at the same time. I really do like Craig as Bond too. He’s very much like Timothy Dalton in how he is much more no-nonsense and far less jokey. Javier Bardem is a great villain, perhaps the best of the Daniel Craig era of films.

Well, this is it, my look back on sixty years of James Bond and at films that are sharing a milestone within those six decades. I’ll have a few more James Bond articles through the year to continue my James Bond at sixty celebrations.

In Memorandum: Sean Connery As Not Bond

LBoM: In Memorandum

What a shitty year for James Bond fans eh? Honor Blackman, Diana Rigg, Michael Lonsdale and now Sean Connery. For the last few days, I’ve struggled with trying to write something in way to pay respects to the great Sean Connery. I’ve sat here, just staring at a blank white screen and a blinking cursor for about an hour or so, no idea what to say now that Connery has sadly passed away. It’s not that there’s nothing to write about, just that, I already pretty much said it all back in August for his birthday. The man was an acting legend and one I’ve toughly enjoyed watching over the years. In my eyes, he deserves a memorandum write-up from me, just as I have done with others I admire and we’ve lost. But as I said, I’ve already pretty much covered his career for his birthday.

I suppose I could just be lazy and repost my article, give it a little update. But no, Sean Connery deserves better than that.

Every other article you’ve read about Connery, now that he’s gone, would probably prominently be about James Bond, it’s the character he was best known for and a character that has stood the test of time. He was the first to play James Bond don’t you know? Well technically, he was the third, but let’s not split hairs. But, he was so much more than one character, Sean Connery had a very lengthy career where he played numerous characters. That’s when it hit me, I could write a Sean Connery article that doesn’t mention Bond (except for this intro) So, no James Bond from this point on, but a look at other characters Mr Connery has played over the years instead. In no particular order… except for the first and then saving the best for last, here’s some of my favourite Sean Connery performances that aren’t that famous British spy.

Zed

I had to pick this one to start, I just had to. Just look at that for a striking image of a man! John Boorman’s Zardoz from 1974 is a sci-fi film that is very…. ‘interesting’. The film is set in 2293 and is about how the human race are split into two groups. Immortal ‘Eternals’ and the mortal ‘Brutals’. Connery plays Zed, a Brutal Exterminator, these Brutal Exterminators are ordered by a huge stone head called Zardoz to hunt, terrorise and kill other Brutals.

Look, the film makes no sense and was ravaged by critics at the time. It had a convoluted plot and connects to The Wonderful Wizard of Oz that I really can’t be bothered to get into here. It’s a really stupid film, but one that has gone on to gain cult status among film fans. Plus, it had given us one hell of a great image of Sean Connery to remember him by too.

“Brain emissions refract low wavelength laser light, passing through the crystal in the brain. They’re a code sent to you for interpretation and storage. Yes or no?”

– Zed

Juan Sánchez-Villalobos Ramírez

Or just Ramírez to his friends. Oh how I love the 1986 flick, Highlander. You got Christopher Lambert, an American born actor, raised in France, playing a Scottish 16th century warrior. Then you have the very Scottish Sean Connery, playing an Egyptian from Spain. That’s some brilliant casting. Highlander tells the story if a secret war among immortals, who are destined to battle each other to the death until only one remains. But just how do you kill an immortal? Well, you cut their head of of course. Seriously, Highlander makes no sense… but it’s glorious.

Though I grew up watching certain famous spy movies as a kid which starred Sean Connery, this was the film that really made me a fan of his work. Just hearing that unmistakable Scottish brogue as the voice of a character who is an Egyptian from Spain (?) always made me chuckle. I love that, even though Connery was a truly amazing actor, he just never bothered to chance his voice. But his voice was almost like his trademark, hearing Sean Connery not sounding like Sean Connery just wouldn’t work. Juan Sánchez-Villalobos Ramírez is a perfect example of this.

“You have the manners of a goat and you smell like a dung-heap. And you’ve no knowledge whatsoever of your potential.”

– Juan Sánchez-Villalobos Ramírez

Henry Jones, Sr.

It was my older bother who took me to the cinema back in 1989 to watch Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. By then, I was a huge Indy fan as well as being an admirer of Sean Connery too. So to have the two meet and for me to watch them on the big screen was a pure joy. When the end credits rolled and as Henry Jones and his son rode off into the sunset, I had a huge smile on my face. The perfect end to a great trilogy (as it was then).

Despite there only being a twelve year gap between Harrison Ford playing Indiana Jones and Sean Connery as his father, the duo and chemistry between the two worked. They bounced of each other perfectly and created a very memorable double act that felt like a genuine father and son. Henry Jones, Sr was more than capable of keeping up with his adventurous son, in more ways than one… just ask Elsa.

“It tells me, that goose-stepping morons like yourself should try reading books instead of burning them!”

– Henry Jones, Sr.

Daniel Dravot

Michael Caine and Sean Connery were very close friends, it really is a shame these two titans of the big screen never did more films together. In fact, they only ever did one, 1975’s The Man Who Would Be King, based on Rudyard Kipling’s 1888 novella of the same name. In it Connery plays Daniel Dravot, a British Army soldier who, along with Peachy Carnehan (Michael Caine) got to Kāfiristān (modern-day Afghanistan) to forcibly take over as rulers.

The Man Who Would Be King is one of those great classics with both Michael Caine and Sean Connery on tip-top form. It is when Connery’s Daniel Dravot is mistaken for a God when things really get underway here. Both Sirs, Caine and Connery put in amazing performances, you can really tell how close they were as friends as their real life chemistry is right there on the screen. In fact both Michael Caine and Sean Connery went on record as saying that working on The Man Who Would Be King was the best experience of their careers.

“Now listen to me you benighted muckers. We’re going to teach you soldiering. The world’s noblest profession. When we’re done with you, you’ll be able to slaughter your enemies like civilized men.”

– Daniel Dravot

Draco

Sean Connery was so damn amazing that he really could play anything, even a dragon! DragonHeart from 1996 saw Connery provide the voice for the last dragon in the world, Draco who teams up with a dragon hunter to take down a tyrannical leader. The twist is that some years before Draco saved this naughty leader when he was a child by giving him half of his heart.

Just as with any of his previous roles, Connery never changed his voice. So we have a very Scottish dragon in this fantasy action-adventure film, but it works. That was the beauty and majesty of Sean Connery’s voice, it just worked. From conveying anger, resentment to more lighter jokey lines, Connery really helped to bring this dragon to life. I mean, you don’t hire Sean Connery for voice work if you don’t want that iconic voice do you?

“You should never listen to minstrels’ fancies. A dragon would never hurt a soul, unless they tried to hurt him first.”

– Draco

King Agamemnon

Terry Gilliam’s Time Bandits is one of those film you either ‘get’ or don’t. A surreal, very Gilliam-esque, time jumping fantasy adventure film. It is when the film’s main character Keven, finds himself in Mycenaean Greece when he crosses paths with King Agamemnon, played by Connery. This really is just an extended cameo and Connery is first hidden behind a helmet to reveal the surprise.

In fact, Terry Gilliam wrote in the script that King Agamemnon takes of his helmet ‘revealing someone that looks exactly like Sean Connery, or an actor of equal but cheaper stature’. Gilliam wanting someone as iconic as Connery, but knowing that having the man himself play the role would be almost impossible due to budget constraints. But the script for the film made its way into Connery’s hands and he loved it, the next thing Gilliam knew, Connery’s agent was on the phone saying how much he wanted to play the part. It really is a joyous performance and you can tell Sean Connery was having a lot of fun with it. A role he was in for the pleasure of acting over the money he was being paid.

“Well… You’re certainly a chatty little fellow, aren’t you?”

– King Agamemnon

John Patrick Mason

He actually looks good with long hair eh? At this point, Connery was in his mid-sixties when he starred in the all action romp, The Rock from 1996. Playing John Mason, ex-SAS, all round bad-ass and the only man to have ever escaped Alcatraz Island. A bunch of of rogue U.S. Force Recon Marines take control of Alcatraz, holding tourists as prisoners and threatening San Francisco with missiles armed with toxic VX gas. Mason is forced to team up with the FBI’s top chemical weapons specialist to stop them.

I love this film, it’s just a great slice of action nonsense. It really is Sean Connery’s performance as the ageing John Mason that lifts this above just being another bog-standard action film. His chemistry with Nicolas Cage as FBI agent, Stanley Goodspeed really works. Connery almost becomes mentor-like to the inexperienced and nervous Cage, both on and off screen.

“I’ve been in jail longer than Nelson Mandela, so maybe you want me to run for President?”

– John Patrick Mason

Captain Marko Ramius

The Hunt for Red October from 1990 is one of Connery’s most talked about roles… mainly for the fact he still used his thick Scottish accent to play a Russian submarine Captain. Set in 1984, Marko Ramius takes command of nuclear missile armed submarine, Red October. Making the sub seemingly ‘disappear’, the U.S. believe that Ramius is planning a renegade nuclear strike on U.S. soil. However, he actually wants to defect.

I’ve not seen this is a long time, yet I always remember it as being a pretty damn good thriller. Based on Tom Clancy’s novel of the same name and the first film appearance of the character, Jack Ryan. But it is Sean Connery’s Captain Marko Ramius that makes this film what it is, a tense and taught thriller about a submarine.

“Once more, we play our dangerous game, a game of chess against our old adversary, The American Navy. For forty years, your fathers before you and your older brothers played this game and played it well. But today the game is different. We have the advantage.”

– Captain Marko Ramius

Jim Malone

This really is the big one. You see that main image for this article at the top, the one with Sean Connery lifting his first ever Oscar? Well, this is why he won it. That picture was taken at the 1988 Academy Awards, at that point Connery was a screen legend, already acting in movies for almost thirty-five years, yet that was his first and only Oscar win. It was this role as tough Irish cop (with a Scottish accent) Jim Malone in 1987’s The Untouchables that landed Connery that Best Supporting Actor Oscar.

A fantastic cast, a wonderful story, with some beautiful directing from Brian De Palma makes this one hell of a great flick. Yet, for me, it was Connery playing the straight-talking, no bullshit taking Jim Malone that really makes this worth watching again and again.

“You just fulfilled the first rule of law enforcement: make sure when your shift is over you go home alive. Here endeth the lesson.”

– Jim Malone

So that’s it, just a few choice picks from Sean Connery’s illustrious acting career of some of my favourite characters. From silly sci-fi to gritty thrillers, Sean Connery was a true screen legend. The world is a slightly less enjoyable place without him.

“I have always hated that damn James Bond. I’d like to kill him.”

– Sean Connery

Sean Connery At Ninety

LBoM: Editorials

Ninety years ago today on the 25th August, 1930, Thomas Sean Connery was born in Edinburgh, Scotland. The world didn’t know it then, but it had just been introduced to one of the finest actors to ever grace the screen.

Growing up in Fountainbridge, Edinburgh, Thomas (as he was known then) was the son of cleaning woman, Euphemia McBain McLean and truck driver, Joseph Connery. While named Thomas, his friends began to use his middle name of Sean and it just stuck from that point on. At the age of sixteen, Sean signed up to join the Royal Navy in 1946. He trained at the naval gunnery school in Portsmouth in the anti-aircraft crew. He was discharged from service aged nineteen due to a duodenal ulcer condition that affected most of the males in his family at that point. After which, Sean held down several jobs including being a milkman, lorry driver, lifeguard at a swimming baths, a coffin polisher he even did a bit of modelling. He turned to bodybuilding and entered the Mr. Universe contest (some sources say 1950, others say 1954) where he placed third.

A keen football fan and player, Sean Connery was offered a chance to play for Manchester United by then manager, Matt Busby. He turned the offer down realising that he was, perhaps, a bit to old to become a professional footballer. So as Sean didn’t see it as a sensible long term career move. Instead, he thought about becoming an actor.

“I realised that a top-class footballer could be over the hill by the age of thirty, and I was already twenty-three. I decided to become an actor and it turned out to be one of my more intelligent moves.”

– Sean Connery

Sean found himself a job working behind the scenes at the King’s Theatre in Edinburgh around 1951 and he landed his first acting roll in a production of the musical South Pacific. It was a very minor role, but as the production continued, Sean got promoted through various rolls to become one of the leads. In 1954, Sean met and became close friends with Michael Caine at a party for the South Pacific production. From then on, he began to rub shoulders with the likes of Hollywood actress Shelley Winters and also landed a few minor roles in films. 1957’s No Road Back is the first major film Sean Connery had a role in, it was a small part playing a gangster with a speech impediment, but it was enough to get him noticed. By the late fifties, he started to appear in TV and films more and more, including a lead role in the Disney film Darby O’Gill and the Little People from 1959.

Of course, the sixties were where Sean Connery would really get noticed as in 1962, he became James Bond in Dr. No and would go on to become the often most voted favourite James Bond actor. His casting as James Bond catapulted Sean into Hollywood stardom. Originally though, James Bond creator, Ian Fleming really didn’t like Sean Connery for the role.

“He’s not what I envisioned of James Bond looks. I’m looking for Commander Bond and not an overgrown stunt-man.”

– Ian Fleming

Yet, after Dr. No became such a big hit and after seeing Sean Connery’s performance, Ian Fleming was so impressed that he even included some of Sean’s heritage into the James Bond character. In his 1964 novel You Only Live Twice, Ian decided to make James Bond’s father Scottish so the character fit more into Sean’s obvious Scottish roots. Despite the character making him so famous and starring in the first five James Bond films from 1962 – 1971, Sean began to tire of the character and worried he would become typecast.

“If you were his friend in these early days you didn’t raise the subject of Bond. He was, and is, a much better actor than just playing James Bond, but he became synonymous with Bond. He’d be walking down the street and people would say, “Look, there’s James Bond.” That was particularly upsetting to him.”

– Michael Caine

While still playing James Bond, Sean landed several other big movie rolls, including working with the master of suspense himself, Alfred Hitchcock in 1964’s Marnie. In 1975, he starred alongside his longtime friend, Michael Caine in The Man Who Would Be King. A film both actors say was the most fun and one of the best film-making experiences that they ever had. After James Bond and through the seventies, Sean’s career grew and grew, landing rolls in Robin and Marian, Murder on the Orient Express and A Bridge Too Far to name a few. By the eighties, he career showed no signs of slowing down either.

The Terry Gilliam classic, Time Bandits saw Sean Connery play Agamemnon, in what was essentially a joke role, but one that stands out in an already brilliant film. Then in 1983, Sean did something he swore he would never do… he returned as James Bond, the role he grew tired with. Playing James Bond in the not actually official Never Say Never Again, which is really a remake of the previous James Bond film, Thunderball (it’s a slightly confusing story). The title of the film is actually a reference to Sean saying that he would never play the James Bond character again. Also, people incorrectly state that Never Say Never Again was the last time he played the famous character. It was the last time he played him on screen yes, but in 2005, a video game version of From Russia with Love was made by Electronic Arts called, Bond 007: From Russia with Love and Sean Connery recorded all new dialogue as James Bond and allowed the use of his likeness too. So if the trivia question ever comes up asking when the last time Sean Connery played James Bond, the answer isn’t Never Say Never Again as most people think.

The eighties also saw Sean Connery star in two of my favourite films. First up, there is the head chopping, awesome Queen sountracked, time jumping masterpiece that is Highlander. Here, Sean played Juan Sánchez-Villalobos Ramírez, a Spanish (he’s not Spanish, he’s Egyptian) immortal, sword wielding mentor and friend to Christopher Lambert’s, Connor MacLeod, a French man (born in America) playing someone form Scotland. Yeah, the casting of this flick really does make the head hurt. Anyway, I love Highlander, so much so that I did a retrospective of the movie franchise a while back.

That other film I love so much was Brian De Palma’s brilliant take on the famed The Untouchables. Telling the story of Eliot Ness and his team of ‘untouchable’ police officers trying to bring Al Capone to justice during the prohibition era of America. Here, Sean Connery played straight talking, no nonsense beat cop, Jimmy Malone, the Irish cop with a thick Scottish accent. Oh how I love this film and Sean Connery in it, a role he won an Oscar for, very much deserved too. This could be my all time favourite Sean Connery performance. He was pushing fifty-seven years-old too, an age where most Hollywood actors were taking it easy and winding down. But not for Sean, he was playing hard edged rolls and even got involved in the action. Well, he was an incredibly fit and active man, even in his twilight years. The Untouchables is a great mobster flick told from the perspective of those trying to keep the mobsters under control. A movie full of great, memorable scenes and dialogue.

“You wanna know how to get Capone? They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. That’s the Chicago way! And that’s how you get Capone.”

– Jimmy Malone

After his Oscar win for The Untouchables, Sean found himself very much in demand and he ended the eighties with easily one of the greatest pairings of action heroes ever.

George Lucas has gone on record as saying that the Indiana Jones character was very much inspired by James Bond. He and Steven Spielberg wanted Indy to be the James Bond of the 1930s. So who better to play the father of the man inspired by James Bond other than James Bond himself? Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, released in 1989 teamed up Harrison Ford and Sean Connery for, what was then, the final in the Indiana Jones trilogy. The camaraderie between the two actors is amazing and Sean, despite being just shy of sixty, got involved with the action again.

In 1990’s The Hunt For Red October (a film Sean was quickly drafted in to do with only two weeks notice), he played a Russian submarine commander, Marko Ramius… with a Scottish accent.

Okay, so right here, I want to address the elephant in the room. Sean Connery was a fantastic actor, he could play anything. But yes, his accent let him down as no matter what role he played, he had that accent. Egyptian immortal, Scottish accent. Irish cop, Scottish accent. Russian submarine commander, Scottish accent. But you know what? I just don’t care. Sean’s voice, his accent was so iconic that it didn’t matter that it never changed. That dragging of the ‘S’ and the ‘sshhh’ sound was his trademark. That thick Scottish brogue was poetry to my ears. I really did not care that Sean’s accent hardly changed, if ever, from character to character. I didn’t care because Sean Connery was just so damn engrossing to watch. He could read the phone-book out loud and it would be entertaining.

You want to know how great Sean’s voice was? He could play a dragon and still be convincing, that’s how great. In 1996, Sean voiced Draco the dragon in the fantasy flick, Dragonheart. Featuring a still impressive looking CGI dragon, Sean made the character utterly charming and lovable… for a dragon. Also from 1996 was the bombastic The Rock were Sean played John Patrick Mason, ex-SAS captain and the only man to have ever escaped the famed Alcatraz island prison. Teaming up with Nicolas Cage’s FBI Special Agent Dr. Stanley Goodspeed, the two have to break into Alcatraz when it’s taken over by a group of marines turned rouge. Again, this is an action film with Sean Connery when he should’ve been taking it easy, he was sixty-five at the time.

In the latter nineties, Sean did start to take it easier. He appeared in fewer films, despite the fact he was still massively popular. He played the main villain in the film adaption of the classic TV show, The Avengers. Bowler hat John Steed The Avengers, not Captain America The Avengers. Though I do think that having a seventy year-old Sean Connery play all-American superhero, Captain America with a Scottish accent would’ve been amazing.

Yup, I have to mention it… The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen from 2005. A film so bad that it made Sean Connery retire from acting (true story). Apparently Sean had such a bad time on set, he and director Stephen Norrington just couldn’t get on and often argued over where the film was heading or what it was about. As he said himself…

“It was a nightmare. The experience had a great influence on me, it made me think about showbiz. I get fed up dealing with idiots.”

– Sean Connery

And so, that was it. After a movie career that began in 1954 as an extra, Sean Connery officially announced his retirement from acting in 2007. He turned down the opportunity to return as Henry Jones in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. He turned down the chance to play Gandalf in The Lord of the Rings trilogy, as well as the role as The Architect in The Matrix sequels, a part written with Sean Connery in mind. Sean was done with acting for good… kind of. His actual last film was the low budget, animated Scottish production, Sir Billi from 2013. I’ve not seen it, but it’s supposed to be pretty terrible…

Just to be clear, Sean Connery refused to come out of retirement for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, even only for a small cameo… but he came out of retirement for this?

Aside from the previously mentioned Oscar win for The Untouchables in 1998, Sean Connery has had various awards and honours bestowed on him. Three Golden Globes in 1972, 1998 and 1992. The latter being the Cecil B. DeMille Award given for outstanding contributions to the world of entertainment. Two BAFTAs in 1988, one being the BAFTA Fellowship, the highest honour given for outstanding achievement in the art forms of the moving image.

He also won the American Film Institute Life Achievement Award in 2006. as well as many other accolades over the years. Oh yeah, he was also knighted on the 5th of July, 2000, making him Sir Sean Connery.

Happy ninetieth birthday Sean. Thanks for the movies over the years… even the bad ones.

Would you believe it, I just covered Sean Connery’s career spanning seven decades and I didn’t even mention or reference Zardoz once…

“I like women. I don’t understand them, but I like them.”

– Sean Connery

There can be only one! Part I

LBoM: Editorials

Yeah I know, oxymoron right?

Did you know Highlander is 30 years old this year? Granted, not until August. So a few months away yet, but I was watching Highlander on TV recently and it got me thinking…
What the hell happened to Highlander?

I was thinking about film franchises that have gone really, really bad. Quite a few came to mind, but one franchise stood out more than any other and that was Highlander.

So here, I’d like to take a brief look at the film series. I know the franchise had other outlets like the various TV series, games and even books/comics. But I only want to concentrate on main films of the franchise here and try to work out how it all went so wrong so quickly.

If you’re have never seen any of the films in the franchise, then be forewarned as this will contain huge spoilers.

Best get stuck in as there is a lot to cover. So lets go back to the film that started it all.

Highlander: This film was not a huge box office success. However, it became a cult classic when released for the home market and is still considered one of the best films of the 80s.

The plot revolves around a young Scottish warrior named Connor MacLeod (Christopher Lambert) from the 16th century who is wounded on the battlefield by someone known as The Kurgan (Clancy Brown). The wound is a mortal one and Connor declared dead.
Yet the very next day he is up and walking with no ill effects from his battle. He is outcast and ostracised by his village as being in league with the devil and forced to make a new life for himself. This is when he meets Heather who eventually becomes the love of his life.

The two make a life for themselves and are living happily until Connor receives a visit from a stranger called Juan Sánchez Villa-Lobos Ramírez (Sean Connery), a Spanish (he’s not Spanish, he’s Egyptian) traveller.
Ramírez reveals to Connor that he is an immortal and will never grow old or even die unless his head is removed from his body.
Ramírez is also an immortal and there are many others around the world too. The Kurgan who tried to kill Conner previously is also an immortal. Ramírez goes on to explain that all the immortals have a destiny, that is to fight each other until only one remains (there can be only one).

As the immortals become fewer and fewer over the years, they will feel an unavoidable pull you one place to fight to the death leaving only one final immortal (there can be only one). This is called ‘The Gathering’ and that final immortal can claim ‘The Prize’.
Ramírez tells Connor he can not let The Kurgan claim ‘The Prize’ as he will use it for evil. So Ramírez begins to train Connor in sword combat and prepare for the fight ahead.

Eventually the immortals are killed off over the centuries until only a handful remain. They last few immortals including Connor and The Kurgan are eventually drawn to New York in 1985. The place and time of ‘The Gathering’.

As the last of the immortals are killed, leaving only Connor and The Kurgan left. They fight each other to the death where Connor eventually bests The Kurgan and claims ‘The Prize’ as Connor becomes the only immortal left alive…there can be only one.

Yes I know I have brought up that line a few times already and even titled the article as such too, but there is a very good reason for doing so which I will cover later…

As I said previously, Highlander was not a box office smash, but it has and still does have a strong cult following. It has become one of those quintessential 80s movies.
However, it was also a film that was pretty much self contained and really left no wriggle room for sequels, as…there can be only one!

Yet as the film did do so well after becoming such a cult classic and favourite. A sequel was commissioned and released in 1991.
Oh dear…

Highlander II: The Quickening: Often regarded as one of the worst film sequels ever made. The original film was far from perfect and had several problems. What this sequel seems to have done is taken everything that was great about the first film and throw it out. Then just taken the remains of the crap and make an entire film from it all.

If you thought the plot of the first film was stupid (it kind of was), you ain’t seen nothing yet…

Set in the future of 2024…yeah, you’ve lost interest already haven’t you?
Connor is now an old man after claiming ‘The Prize’ from the previous film has allowed him to age. He has used his amazing powers from ‘The Prize’ to help develop a shield around the earth to replace the damaged ozone layer. Hey, I did warn you about the plot and it’s only going to get much, much, oh so much worse from here…

Anyway, where as the original film left a lot of ambiguity to who/what the immortals were. Here everything is cough “explained”.
Apparently the immortals are aliens from a planet called Zeist. Yes I did just type that, they are aliens from a planet called Zeist. However they are not immortal on Zeist, I’ll cover this next.

Planet Zeist is a horrendous place rife with poverty and war.
While on Zeist centuries ago, Connor MacLeod was part of a rebellion lead by Ramírez who plan to try and overthrow the big bad of this film General Katana (Michael Ironside) and his oppressive regime. However, Katana’s men attack and capture both Ramírez and Connor MacLeod and kill the rest of the rebels. Ramírez and Connor are put on trial by Zeist’s priests, who sentence them to be exiled and reborn on Earth as immortals in pursuit of ‘The Prize’ (the first film).

So the events of the first film happened, leading into the events of this film with Connor now an old man almost ready to die from old age…until for some reason General Katana back on Zeist (who hasn’t aged a day over the centuries) decides to send two more Zeist aliens to Earth to kill Connor. The two ‘assassins’ fail in their mission and get decapitated and this, for some reason, makes Connor young and immortal once more.

Hey, I did warn you about the plot remember?

Here is a conversation taken straight from the film itself to “explain”.

Louise Marcus: “Okay, now let me just see if I can get this straight. You come from another planet, and you’re mortal there, but you’re immortal here until you kill all the guys from there who have come here… and then you’re mortal here… unless you go back there, or some more guys from there came here, in which case you become immortal here… again.”

Conner MacLeod: “Something like that.”

Remember, that is the film trying to explain all of this.

Anyway, as General Katana’s minions failed, he decides to come to Earth himself to kill Connor.
Ramírez who was most definitely killed in the first film is back because…the script says so. Connor and Ramírez team up to kill Katana, and that’s about it really.

Highlander II: The Quickening is so full of problems (of which I’ll cover later) its just plain embarrassing. It really is one of the worst most lazily written films ever. There is a reason why this is considered one of the worst sequels ever, because it really, really is.

The film bombed and has gone on to become one of the most hated films ever made. So much so there have been several different cuts released over the years, one that even attempts to remove the whole aliens/Zeist thing completely, so if you have seen Highlander II and don’t remember any aliens, this is most probably why.
Yet it really does not matter which version you watch, its a bad film.

Even though this film killed the Highlander franchise before it began…another sequel was made.

Highlander III: The Sorcerer: Now this film is nowhere nearly as bad as the last one…though its still not very good.
This film flat out ignores Highlander II and pretends it never existed and many fans claim that this one is the true and proper sequel to the original film.

Onto the plot (ignoring the events of Highlander II).
The film tells to story of Connor who after the death of his wife Heather from the first film, travels to Japan to request training from the Immortal Japanese sorcerer Nakano. Another Immortal named Kane also wants to ‘learn’ from Nakano and finds the sorcerer in a cave, then decapitates him. The force of ‘The Quickening’ from Nakano causes the cave to collapse trapping Kane inside…and this is why he could not take part in ‘The Gathering’ from the first film.

Then in 1994, in Japan, two archaeologists start excavating the cave in an attempt to discover whether the legend of the sorcerer Nakano was based on fact. The excavations free Kane, who immediately sets out in pursuit of Connor.
This all leads to a final showdown between Connor and Kane which Connor eventually wins.

Highlander III: The Sorcerer is not a great film, but its a damn sight better then that other sequel.

I’ll end Part I here, but there is more Highlander silliness coming in Part II of this “There can be only one” look at the Highlander franchise as the sequels get worse, maybe even worse than Highlander II?

The Kurgan: “I’m in disguise!”

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Zed

Juan Sánchez-Villalobos Ramírez

Henry Jones, Sr.

Daniel Dravot

Draco

King Agamemnon

John Patrick Mason

Captain Marko Ramius

Jim Malone

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